The DVD Dump

Well, my picks sure were off.

WORST PICTURE: The Love Guru

Wow. I heard this movie was bad, but THAT bad? Worse than the combined efforts of Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans? That’s saying something.

WORST ACTOR: Mike Myers for The Love Guru

That’s right, Mr. Myers. People are finally sick of your cute poop and penis jokes. It’s finally time to get off that gravy train and act like a real actor again.

WORST ACTRESS: Paris Hilton for The Hottie and the Nottie

I couldn’t agree more. Paris Hilton should never be considered the lead actress in any movie even if it is one catering to her interests.

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Pierce Brosnan for Mamma Mia

How could a former James Bond actor go so wrong? If you are in a musical and you can’t sing, you’re in trouble. Come on, Pierce, you’re a good actor just stay the heck away from musicals.

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Paris Hilton for Repo! The Genetic Opera

From what I’ve heard, the movies is actually pretty good, but I guess were just not done yet with hating on Paris Hilton.

WORST SCREEN COUPLE: Paris Hilton and either Christine Lakin or Jorel David Moore for The Hottie and the Nottie

The lesson here is that Paris Hilton is Razzie gold.

WORST PREQUEL, SEQUEL, RIP-OFF OR REMAKE: Indiana Jones and the Temple of the Crystal Skull

Wait, this one didn’t go to the combined efforts of Disaster Movie and the Meet the Spartans. That is pure BS! Granted, it was not the greatest Indiana Jones it could’ve been, but, seriously, are the Razzies just ignoring the cinematic abortions of Disaster Movie and the Meet the Spartans?

WORST DIRECTOR: Uwe Boll for Tunnel Rats, In the Name of the King, Postal

Congratulations, Mr. Boll. Your legacy is intact as the worst director of the 21st century.

WORST SCREENPLAY: Mike Myers and Graham Gordy for The Love Guru

I’m sorry, Mr. Myers, but you just can’t write even with help.

WORST CARREER ACHIEVEMENT: Uwe Boll, Germany’s answer to Ed Wood.

Congratulations, once again, Mr. Boll. Nobody can make a bad movie like you. When are going to fight the Razzies staff in the boxing ring for this attack on your character?

So I have one big problem with the Razzies this year. There wasn’t one win for Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans which were COMBINED for just about every category. Seriously, the guys behind these movies are lazy, unfunny writers who believe they are funny and keep making these horrible ‘parodies’. And, yes, I think they are far worse than Uwe Boll. They’re relatively new to the scene, but just you wait. There will come a day when they will sweep the Razzies (if they ever make another movie which I’m hoping they won’t). Actually, now that I think about it, maybe it’s a good thing they didn’t win. Maybe their careers in movie-making will end when we finally forget about them. When you think about it, the Razzies are still recognizing Uwe Boll and Paris Hilton and they’ll probably get more awards in the future.

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