An American in China

All I’m saying is that if this movie took place in Korea, it would not be a romantic coemdy.

Blood Moon Rising

Ron Jeremy in a campy zombie flick where he is the most capable actor. Hey, anything to keep him outta porno.

Far Cry

I’m not angry at you anymore, Uwe Boll. I’m just dissapointed.

Janky Promoters

Couldn’t find a trailer mainly because I’ve never heard of Third Rail Releasing. Maybe this movie starring Ice Cube and Mike Epps will put them on the map. Nah, they’ll keep cranking out crap.

Megafault

I would say this is Asylum’s answer to 2012, but it seems so generalized it could rip-off any disaster movie. Expect Megafault 2 when the next disaster movie arrives in theaters.

Oil on Water

I don’t know how to criticize this movie….it’s too…beautiful?

Reborn

Great, I feel a lot better about buying a foreclosure.

National Lampoon’s RoboDoc

Once again, another decent concept turned to fecal matter by National Lampoon. COLLEGE!!! WOOOO!!!!

Santa Buddies

Just in time to ruin Thanksgiving, more talking doggies for the kids.

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Taking Chances

Justin Long fights back the Indians in a modern setting.

The Terrorist Next Door

This Thanksgiving, be thankful for your bounty and don’t trust Muslims because they’re probably a terrorist.

The Witches Hammer

Another vampire movie, but unlike New Moon, this one actually has some real action and not just motion blurs floating across the screen.

I lived in my parents basement and only ONCE had the urge to cut someone with a machete (and that someone was Uwe Boll).

Blue Seduction

Billy Zane in a dopey soap opera movie.

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

The Canyon

The dude in the trailer is right; ‘we should have gone to Hawaii’. The sad truth is there probably will be a survival movie about that too.

Franklyn

For the teenager who wants some Hot Topic with their V for Vendetta.

The Locator 2: Braxton Returns

Which lines do you think will be uttered in this return-to-action flick? ‘They just pull me back in’ or ‘I’m getting too old for this sh*t’?

The Open Road

Justin Timberlake…and *yawn* Jeff Bridges…in a movie about…family…and…awkwardness…and comedy. I guess.

Tanlight

Normally I’m on board with satire especially for something like Twilight, but Twilight does a good job parodying itself already. At least this was on time for New Moon.

Train

Can’t wait for the next Saw or Hostel movie? Well, here is some stylized torture porn to hold you over.

The Wild Child

Rob Schneid–Emma Robberts was a pampered LA teen when she went to far and her dad sent her off *record scratch* to an English boarding school. Now, she’ll learn that in order to become a lady, you have to do more than act like a stupid bitch. But it still doesn’t mean this wild child can’t have some fun! THE WILD CHILD, rated PG-13.

Uma Thurman IS The Radio Love Doctor; she doesn’t break balls, she breaks hearts.

American Virgin

Rob Schneider IS…no, sorry. I can’t do this.

Bald

Just because Patrick Stewart looked sexy doesn’t mean that going bald is in.

 The Break-Up Artist

Is there some anti-Valentines Day holiday in November I don’t know about? Because I’m sensing a theme here.

Hurt

The poor man’s Orphan, also on DVD this month.

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Ink

There is something about fighting evil forces in your dreams with your dad that seems…sweet.

The Line

Ray Liotta fights crime in Mexico. And gets a little action for himself along the way.

Natalee Holloway

A family searches for justice in a 30% true story.

Summer’s Moon

Much like with Harry Potter, the Twilight kids will be type-casted for years to come.

Just recently as October of 2009, Millcreek Entertainment signed a new deal with Stephen J. Cannel Productions to exclusively distribute seven of their TV series including 21 Jump Street, Greatest American Hero, Hunter, and Silk Stalkings just to name a few. Earlier in 2009, Millcreek also acquired the rights to distribute He-Man Masters of the Universe (2002 version) and Dungeons and Dragons from the now defunct BCI/Eclipse. But just how did this Minnesota based distributor acquire so many titles? They’ve actually been doing it for years, starting with public-domain movies.

Founded in 2003 as a subsidiary to Digital1Shop, Millcreek Entertainment distributes DVDs through Alliance Entertainment, Anderson Merchandisers, Baker & Taylor, ESI Distribution, Ingram Entertainment, Navarre Corporation, Vivendi Visual Entertainment, VPD and WaxWorks. While there have been many competitors in the public-domain video distribution game (including the pricey Alpha Video and the now defunct Digiview), Millcreek stood out in both quantity and price. Acquiring several masters of public-domain movies, Millcreek distributed these movies in giant, double-disc sets that would include anywhere from 10-250 movies at a price that would usually equate to about fifty cents a movie. These sets specialized in everything from westerns to science fiction. For years, they have been the front-runners in value-priced DVDs, but now that they’ve acquired so many TV shows that were once distributed at double the price Millcreek is asking, they may become the next juggernaut of TV-on-DVD distributors (if they’re not already).

Already their latest TV titles have earned the company its own shelf section at Target. It’s kind of odd how just a little over a year ago I was staring at He-Man Master of the Universe Volume 1 on their shelves for $15 from BCI/Eclipse. Now I’m staring at that same volume under Millcreek for $5. Not to mention that with every TV show they pick up that was once on DVD, all extras come with it so you are pretty much getting the same release for a lot less money.

Also, consider Blu-Ray. The amount of data that can be written to Blu-Ray is increasing with technology that it’s up to the point where we could fit one hundred movies on a single Blu-Ray disc. While that sounds great, many distributors won’t take much advantage of this because of either the copyright or the price the product would cost. However, if Millcreek enters into the Blu-Ray arena, they could be the leader in writing several movies (or a complete TV series) to a single disc. When and if they decide to take that plunge, they’ll be the ones to take advantage of Blu-Ray’s full capacity potential.

While it may seem ferocious that such a company is gobbling up all these titles and thrusting them out to retailers at incredible speed, it’s comforting to know that movies and TV show which may fall through the cracks into the public domain can be salvaged by Millcreek. What was once seen as a public-domain bargain distributor has now become a big name distributor in TV programs. With millions of DVDs sold each year, it looks likes they are here to stay for awhile.

The Answer Man

Despite how awesome he may be, Jeff Daniels can not solve all of life’s problems.

Bad Cop

Just how many movies did David Carradine act in before he died?

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Command Performance

Dolph Lundgren shows off his directing balls by recreating Die Hard set at a rock concert! Oh, and I guess he stars in it as well.

Death of Evil

Proving that even Satanic religion can be just as brain-washing as Catholic religion.

Hardwired

AKA The Six Million Dollar Man, The Movie.

The Marc Pease Experience

Ben Stiller being goofy and snarky in another movie about being goofy and snarky. Glad you’re getting an easy paycheck, buddy.

Mutants

Want to make your zombie film sound original? Call them mutants!

The Narrows

As long as you look hot, you can achieve the American dream.

The Preview Zone

Too…much…pop culture…with…lame…effects!

Sand Serpents

In the world of the SyFy Channel, Afiganistan is Dune.

StarQuest: The Odyssey

I didn’t know Halcyon still made B-movies? Although since they are selling off the Terminator franchise, they’d better get use to making these.

Vampiro

A documentary about a Canadian wrestler in Mexico? There is something I don’t see everyday. No, seriously, I’ve never seen anything like this.

Where God Left His Shoes

Just when you think Christmas has gone all commercial with poorly written specials, along comes a super-sad movie to make you believe again…at least, that Christmas movies can be good.

ALSO THIS WEEK…

-More Turner Classic Movie Greatest Hits 4-packs: This time focusing on comedy (mostly romantic comedies), family (are all animal related movies), Hitchcock (none of his megahits except maybe Strangers on a Train), and Holidays (A Christmas Carol and a couple of lesser-known romantic Christmas movies).

-Walt Disney Vault Zorro Collections: Resisting the cruel hand of public domain releases, Disney reissues Zorro in seasoned sets retailing at…$60 each?

TURN DOWN THE BRIGHTNESS!

Angel and the Badman

John Wayne would spin in his grave if he knew the guy from 90210 was starring a remake of his movie.

Battlestar Galactica: The Plan

More Cylons! Too bad it’s a small side story spanning across all four seasons.

For Sale By Owner

What’s next? Closed for Maintenance? Dammit, they’re probably going to make that now.

Into Temptation

Proving once and for all that priests can put an end to prostitution. As for underage sex…

Perestroika

Leave Moscow, get labeled a traitor, return a hero.

Stan Helsing

You know, I really like the horror icons of the 1980’s. Now if only they would team up in a—TOO LATE, the Scary Movie producers got to it first.

Tinker Bell and the Lost Treasure

Unless Tink travels to Mordor and battles Eragon, I’m not interested.

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

X-Cross

The Battle Royale director returns to offer up an Asian version of Deliverance with a gothic lolita flavor.

Crush(ed)

This movie proves that you don’t need a steady job or a steady diet to bag a hot wife. Except I already learned that from King of Queens so this looks kind of boring.

Gnaw

That reminds me. Thanksgiving is almost here.

The Haunted Airman

Looking like he hasn’t slept since the last Twilight movie, Robert Pattinson plays a pilot (yes, a pilot) who just can’t get a decent night of sleep.

How to Be a Serial Killer

Either the director never saw the show Dexter or he watched too much of it. Although this does seem like a humorous version of Mr Brooks, but nobody remembers that movie so it looks very original.

Hurricane in the Rose Garden

Why does this feel like Diary of a Mad Black Woman without Madea? Why am I longing for Madea now?

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Infestation

In case you missed summer, here is a movie that perfectly simulates watching fireworks near a mosquito-infested lake.

Jada

Um….yeah. I’d make a joke here, but I’ve feel I’ve already made it…several, several times.

The Killing Room

Do you love the Saw series, but want a more convoluted plot? Have I got a movie for you.

Mr. Art Critic

How much of a-hole do you have to be to be a snobbish art critic and claim anybody can make art?

An Old Fashioned Thanksgiving

Okay, there is a LOT of DVDs this week. Yeah, every week there are a lot of DVDs, but most of them are usually TV series, instructional videos, or re-releases I don’t cover. So I’m going to plow through these as fast as possible, considering most of these are Halloween DVDs.

Assassination of a High School President

Bruce Willis busts into a high school movie, thus saving the film from obscurity.

Aussie & Ted’s Great Adventure

Another damn dog movie. And they DROOL!

Bigfoot

Bigfoot with an I-pod. That is all.

Cameron Romero’s Staunton Hill

George Romero’s son delivers a big F-you to dad by making another lost-in-the-woods-and-assaulted-by-redneck horror movie.

The Children

Brought to you by the Abortion Foundation.

Children of the Corn

The horror classic is back looking goofier than ever. Thanks, SyFy.

Disappearing in America

Immigrant fugitive turned American slave. No, he isn’t working at Blockbuster Video

Donna on Demand

Who the heck would watch a webcam without any nudity, sex, or somebody pissing?

Fast Track: No Limits

Another *yawn* street racing movie. No extreme car chases or action sequences, just racing.

High Noon

Nora Roberts movie. Nuff said.

It’s Alive

A killer baby…kills? Is this abortion week or something?

Mirageman

Mexican Batman.

Northern Lights

ARG! More Nora Roberts! NEXT MOVIE!

Offspring

A sort-of zombie movie?

The Seamstress

Creepy person in the woods seams people’s mouths shut. Although if those people are mostly dumb teenagers, this is a public service.

Seventh Moon

There goes China’s tourism, as if the country doesn’t have enough problems already.

Tribute

DAMMIT, MORE NORA ROBERTS!

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Trick ‘r Treat

The only movie you need to see this Halloween.

Where is Winky’s Horse?

You know there really aren’t enough movies with girls loving horses…
The Wild Stallion

…I spoke too soon.

The war between those who live on farms and those who don’t live on farms continues in this…psychological thriller?

Filth and Wisdom

Madonna directs her first film filled to the brim with thick accents, boobs, and rock music. But not in an awesome way.

The Hills Run Red

Of all the places to look for an obscure horror film, why the woods?

Lies and Illusions

Christian Slater and Cuba Gooding Jr star in this action…thriller….comedy? What the hell is this?

The Lost and Found Family

How could you evict this family? They’re sooooooooo cute!

The Shortcut

An Adam Sandler produced horror movie? Um…okay.

Steam

I’ve read 5th grade book reports with better writing than this.

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Superman/Batman: Public Enemies

Batman and Superman are hunted down villains after calling Lex Luthor a meanie.

ALSO THIS WEEK…

More 4-Film-Favorites Packs: Still picking off the corpse of New Line Cinema, Warner Bros releases another batch of movie collections this time including the Blade and Police Academy franchises.

Jeff Goldblum is pretty creepy…why didn’t he get into horror movies?

Albino Farm

The Hills Have Eyes…and they’re RED!

Clive Barker’s Book of Blood

Looks like a standard ghost horror, but I’ll watch anything by Clive Barker.

The Dread

Remember, you college kids. Saw is a horror movie done by trained professionals. Don’t try it out at school.

Edges of Darkness

Camcorder quality horror, but it gets points for being the most subtle trailer I’ve seen today.

The Haunted World of El Beasto

If Rob Zombie teamed up with Walt Disney, Bambi’s mom would’ve died a hell of a lot worse.

Mercy Streets

Crime and religion collide in a ho-hum drama.

Reverend I’m Available Too

A Tyler Perry fan-movie.

Scooby Doo! The Mystery Begins

I really don’t want to know the see of Scooby Doo. Nor do I wish to see the origins of Snagglepuss, Top Cat, Huckleberry Hound, Yogi Bear, The Neptunes, The Chan Clan or any other Hanna-Barbera cartoon. We never needed one before, why do we need one now?

Sugisball

Not sure about this one, but it’s German so of course it has sex in it.

DVD Dump Pick of the Week:

Wallace & Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death

Dogs before hogs, bro.

ALSO THIS WEEK…

The Howling Trilogy: Ever wonder why there aren’t werewolf movies? It’s mainly because of The Howling  2 & 3.